I have never felt sad around holiday's, I love to see my family and friends. The days leading up to Thanksgiving was a little rough for me and the days following. I am truly thankful for everyone that surrounds me and that I can share my journey and Struggle with you all while I'm still in the midst of my Storm.
All I could think about is why am I not pregnant. Why is it that everyone around me is getting pregnant. The constant struggle is emotionally draining. I'm tired of crying, tired of being sad. Tired of Wanting to slap every person that says "It will Happen", "just relax" etc. I have been praying and talking to God about his purpose for me. The answer is coming to me slowly but surely. I have come to realize that I'm not in control of my life and things will happen when God's see fit. Even though I know this to be true and I pray for my rainbow baby daily, its hard sometimes to stay positive and optimistic that I will get the desires of my heart. I have to just keep praying and have faith, I know that all of what I am going through is part of my testimony and is drawing me closer to God.
Let your Problems drive you into the arms of Jesus. "Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything..Then you will experience God's Peace, which exceeds anything we can understand" PHP 4:6 NLT